Randamarray♡

melonboyy:

i probably say this a lot but i really am dumb as fuck

suburban-justice:

lesbianavagardner:

the energy of ordering food via drive thru and then eating it in your car in the parking lot is so powerful. like you could walk 50 feet and sit at a table in the light but we just stan alienation in this country

me hunched over in the dunkin parking lot like a goblin, devouring an old fashioned donut in the dim orange light of the streetlamps, abba blasting,

slavery:

White guys will smoke a blunt in the Jeep to prepare to hike thru the woods so they can smoke a blunt in the woods just to go back home to smoke a blunt

hi-def-doritos:

hi-def-doritos:

charming-tothelast:

hi-def-doritos:

manasaysay:

hi-def-doritos:

A while back I heard my friend (male) insult another dude by saying, “You look like the kind of guy who wouldn’t go to Wal-Mart to buy his girlfriend a box of tampons” and I still think about that crowning insult sometimes

My dad once called another guy “someone who thinks loading the dishwasher once in a while makes him less of a man”

I like your dad already

one time my dad’s boss was giving him shit for always leaving work early so he could get home and help my mom with me when i was a newborn and his boss said “i’ve never changed a diaper in my life” really proudly and my dad responded “i’d be ashamed to ever admit i was that worthless of a husband”

oh WOW

This is by far my most popular post.

tittiesmattel:

when my friend found out her boyfriend of three years was cheating on her she went through his phone, took pictures of every interaction he had with another girl, printed them out, wrote down where she had been at every instance and what lies he had told her about where he would be, and put them in a folder. when she confronted him and he denied everything she pulled out this big ass folder and just said “lets review” and Honestly, that is the most iconic thing anyone has ever done.